My relationship with english

Well this relationship is kind a messy, I always see series, films and talking by myself in English but I feel I do it like the worst possible way.

To me is difficult express the ideas that I have in English, I don’t found the words cause my vocabulary is I little bit small and my pronunciation is very precarious.

At the contrary of my skills, I wish dominated the idiom and go a different places of the world and at least could have a nice conversation in English (because is the most predominant idiom) and of course can listening music, see films, series, interviews etc in English